Monday, March 17, 2008

Bear Stearns Shits Bed; Lehman says "That Looks Like Fun"

I'm proud to say that I personally helped Bear Stearns into collapse like a nurse easing an old man into a bath. Seeing as my firm is a rather large client of Bear, we def. pulled a 1870's style run on the bank. Which was fun, even if it did lack old timey music and occasional gunfire.


The fallout of all of this is that Bear isn't the last that is going to shit the bed, and as the Fed tries to prop up our economy, the dollar is going to be worth less than whore diamonds on the Emperor Club website. This is going to get a whole lot worse before it gets better. I hope everyone enjoys bread lines and hobo sticks.


Meanwhile, JPMorgan bent Bear over a table by buying it at 2 dollars a share (which is insane in itself as the building is worth at least 1.3 billion) and leaves us with this amazing picture from the news this morning:
Seeing that as you walk in the door to your soon to be non existent job has to be a fucking punch in the balls. Especially if you just lost half you net worth. Ain't America grand?

4 comments:

Smartphone said...

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cseguin said...

I nominate this for best blog comment ever. I also think we should end every blog post with "A hug."

RC said...

That's fantastic!

Also it's time to go liquid - I'm shoving Euros into my fucking mattress.

A hug.
RC

-PS - NCAA blog goes live tomorrow - drinking starts at 11am CST. Whoops.

cseguin said...

RC, I think your post is likeable. Please have 16 beers for me as I sit at work.

A hug.